Japanese people have trouble understanding a lot of concepts, but one of their most frustrating shortcomings is their lack of a corresponding word for "annoying" and "irritating."

They just don't have one.

And believe me, it makes explaining a potentially obnoxious situation nearly impossible. When I told my Japanese friends that we must leave quickly because an "annoying" person want to come along, they asked me, "Why?"

Wide eyed, mouths gaping: "Doushite?"

"Well, he's annoying," I told them in Japanese.

They understood, but then they gave me a quick followup query: "Why is he annoying?"

This was a dilemma, for me, because my Japanese vocabulary simply didn't contain a wide enough array of adjectives to try and explain how a person can become annoying. I attempted an explanation anyway: "He is annoying because he says stupid things." They nodded in agreement. They understood what I said, and they understood that I didn't want him to come along, though I think that is the only reason that they left him behind; because he irritated me, not because they actually understood what it was to be an irritating person.

Bizarre indeed.

Japan, for everything that it contains, is still missing a few sentimental elements that make America the place that it is: squirrels, police sirens, birds.

Don't get me wrong, Japan has police and squirrels... just not in the city.

As for birds, they do have them, but they are about five times the size of the crows in Nebraska, their beaks are seagull size, their eyes are as large as half-dollars, and they float around in the air with a slow flap that is really, really loud. They are fucking scary.

More odd Japanese things: foreigners--Russians, Mexicans, Spaniards and French people--sound quite odd when they speak Japanese. This trip is the first time I've ever heard Japanese spoken with a Spanish accent.

I've forgotten how to write anything worth reading. Oh well.

Tonight we are going to a club in Roppongi, the dance district of Tokyo where there are never-ending corridors of clubs. I invited the Irish girls along with us tonight, and the only question they asked me was, "Is it a proper club?"

And yes, it is.

I'll let you know.